This item was recently sent to me under the title "Another Chinese Toy Recall." Of course, this slur against the Chinese people shall not go unnoticed. They are right now developing a new series of toys, all lead-paint free, in order to avenge honor and give pleasure to rapacious American consumer. Look for these in your Christmas stockings, kiddos!Stacey Skates ‘n’ Stabs
My Size Coffin
Tubby, the Stuffed Beet
Make-Your-Own-Sausage Factory
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtleheads
Little Wiener, the Penis Doll (with lifelike noises!)
My First Taxidermy Kit
Littlekins Power Saw 'n' more
Thomas the Tanked Engine (comes with engraved Island of Sodor flask)
Dora the Down-There Explorer
Catch-a-Poo Home Fishing Kit
Fuck-a me Elmo
5 comments:
You forgot about the revival being planned for that age-old classic: ""The Craw."
This reminds me of that Polish artist who created a Lego concentration camp:
http://users.erols.com/kennrice/lego-kz3.jpg
http://users.erols.com/kennrice/lego-kz4.jpg
http://users.erols.com/kennrice/lego-kz6.jpg
Here's an ethics question—if you're creating a little Sobibor kid's toy, is it okay to use lead paint?
Don't forget!
The "Just One Chance" Bomb Disposal Work-Kit
Hissy, My First Cobra
The Merry Poppins-Brand "I Can Fly!" Magic Bumbershoot (for use about tenth floor only)
The "I Hate Oatmeal!" Arsenic Shaker
Thinner Skull In Ten Days Head Vice
One-Way Space Helmet (plastic bag and thick rubberband)
The "Butt Bang!" Rectal Fireworks
AND...
"A Toddler's Guide to Stealing & Driving Cars on I-95"
NH uber alles
OK, anonymous 3, it is time to start your own RIVAL BLOG. I dares ye!
My favorite David Letterman toy:
Mob-controlled Lego construction set
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