Thursday, November 29, 2007

The Head Spa Diaries: Day One

I received the item pictured here as a birthday gift from a very dear friend who reads this blog regularly. His thoughtful gift was intended to reduce the headaches of which I had been complaining. I was a bit dubious after seeing the gentleman pictured at the left, as he looked like he might be thinking of increasing his penile girth or asking that young filly out from the cubicle next to him, rather than relaxing in skull-numbing bliss. Just what was he up to? I had to find out. Or rather, I had to appoint a suitable proxy to find out for me. Someone unrelated to me who, when he snaps from the vibrations induced to his brain, will not be within a 20-mile radius of my home and family. Bless his own wife and child; may they keep the keys to their car on their persons at all times.

This report is from this week's guest blogger, HeadSpaaa2007! Here is his first entry.

When: 7AM - 8AM

Activity: Reading and cooking breakfast

Intensity Setting: Approximately 50% strength

Effects: Immediately causes blurred vision from vibration. Sensation
not unpleasant, though a slight feeling of nausea afterwards.

Neck: Good

Shoulders: Good

Scalp: Good

Length: Unchanged

Misc notes: Will try again later. Am anxious to try on Metro North,
during exercise on rowing machine, and during coitus. Yes, it looks
funny, but give it a decade and I'm quite positive everyone will be
wearing one of these throughout the day. Mowing the lawn, in the
aisles at the Home Depot, at a chic restaurant, wherever relaxation
is welcome.... which is everywhere, of course.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow, that's a handsome device. I think the man on my American Express card is wearing one of those.

Anonymous said...

Fresh from Gitmo! The Skull Shaker! You WILL help us with our inquiries...one way or the other. Also useful for watching political debates, and choosing a Pakistani strong man for US financial aid.

NH-er

Knickerbocker said...

The sticker on the front of the box says: "AS SEEN ON TV... IN ABU GHRAIB!"

No, serously, I enjoing it. It makes me feel relaexd. At the day of the end, I silp it on and just sit back. Did I ever kjnm,dfsklf.sdfkk skdjffggeo sldkjjfjjpowiu0uwknm,sd