Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Baby Sunshine, Le Petit Lemur, and Mini Machiavelli

On Saturday the boys and I, along with visiting friends, decided to make the best of a gloomy day and have a parade. Hurrah! We donned lemur tails and ears, made a flag that read "The Prwade," and marched down the street to much fanfare and song. But our merry parade turned into a diabolical death-march in icy winds, with a tyrannical 5-year-old as our leader.

This is that story.

In the driveway.

MINI MACHIAVELLI: Everyone needs to do what I say. I am the leader!

BABY SUNSHINE: Yayayayaya.

LE PETIT LEMUR: My Band-Aid fell off. It must have runned out of stick.

MINI MACHIAVELLI: Stop talking about that. We are now marching in a prwade. I am the leader of the prwade. You will follow me.

The parade begins.

LE PETIT LEMUR: [Hums a song.]

MINI MACHIAVELLI: Your humming is annoying to me. Stop now!

LE PETIT LEMUR: [Continues to hum.]

MINI MACHIAVELLI: This humming is aggravating. You will not get a prize!


LE PETIT LEMUR: I want a prize.

MINI MACHIAVELLI: No prize for you!

He stops to state the rules.

MINI MACHIAVELLI: Number One Rule: Do not go in the street.

Number Two Rule: Do not step on the grass.

Number Three Rule: Do not climb trees.

Number Four Rule: Do not chop down trees or houses.

Number Five Rule: Do not kill people.

They march. The winds grow colder. The singing is weak.

MINI MACHIAVELLI: Stop! I do not hear singing.

LE PETIT LEMUR begins to dance.

MINI MACHIAVELLI: Did I say dancing was okay? Be still now.

BABY SUNSHINE: Nanananana!

MINI MACHIAVELLI: Halt! [All stop.] If you see an animal, don't touch it. Look at it, and let it go on its own.

Many grueling minutes later.

MINI MACHIAVELLI: Baby, you will get a prize. Mommy, you will not get a prize. You did not sing when you needed to sing, and you took your clothes off during the pawade.

MOMMY: Clothes?

MINI MACHIAVELLI: You took your tail off.

LE PETIT LEMUR: Prize! Prize! Prize! [Wild tears.]

MINI MACHIAVELLI: I will come back to you later. Silence! Now, who is next? I will decide on the prizes.

All are silent.


He gestures to the door. The parade members meekly obey.


Anonymous said...

Some of us clever and seasoned paraders bailed out early once we saw which way the wind was blowing!

Old NH

Helen said...

Sad I missed it

- Heidy Heidy Heidy Ho