Wednesday, September 12, 2007
Zac Efron is really a taxidermized, gay Pekingese
Zac Efron, star of Disney's High School Musical phenomenon, is totally a creepy twink. I'll admit, I saw his image on the cover of a magazine as America's hot new hottie, and thought "hrhrm, he's pretty cute." But then I had the misfortune to catch the last 22 minutes of High School Musical 2 last Saturday.
There is no question in my mind that Zac Efron is actually a taxidermized, gay Pekingese in a fairly realistic-looking "boy mask" and pants, operated by Disney remote control. He's sort of cute when it's just a photo, but when the kid opens his mouth and speaks--ooh, it goes all wrong. Those close-set eyes. Icky! I think there's a lot of bad skin under some pancake makeup, too. There's something wrong with his lips.
High School Musical 2 has got to be the most loathsome spectacle I have seen in many moons. I had high hopes for it, thinking it would be a bit of kitschy, effervescent fun. But it's not fun. It is scary and bad, much as Pizza Hut's new OREO PIZZA. Who the hell eats an Oreo pizza? You might as well duct-tape it to your thighs.